Monday, 29 March 2010

Being Angry And Wet Wit

This is the first post on this blogspot (pardon my fuckwit language) since March 5 2009. Today's date is March 29 2010. We are a year further on and, upon returning to my work out of an interest re-ignited by something a friend said, I notice that I am the world's angriest person.

I'm not quite sure how this happened but the evidence is compelling. My assessment of Gok Wan following his appearance on the 2009 BRIT awards show spat more venom than a viper who has just received a phone call in the middle of Eastenders. Wan's crime on the night was only to present an award to some admittedly undeserved recipient. Yet I couldn't leave it there. I was incandescent with rage about Wan getting paid to sneer at people. Getting paid to sneer at people was probably my number one ambition before I started my current job. Irony eh?

On further inspection there were several other victims of my ire, not all of them alive enough to offer any kind of defence. Job interviews, karaoke (which I love, figure that out), family dos, people who don't like Joss Stone, people who do like Rihanna and Lily Allen, people who want to park their car in the same place at the same time as I do, The Ting-Tings and Estelle all managed to grind what Peter Griffin might call 'my gears'. These things seem relatively trivial even to me now, so where does all of this splenetic juice-firing come from, and what's the point?

Dry wit, that's what. When I'm churning out this stuff I am driven to do so by a faint amusement at the rubbishness of all of these things. So it is an attempt at humour which, when you read it back a year later, leaps off the page not as some kind of Newswipe-esque meandering but as a furious tirade against British culture. Something seems to get lost in the translation. I make the mistake of thinking at the time of writing that people will 'get me', when all but a select few are really thinking 'get him'.

So if dry wit leads me down this path ,where would 'wet wit' take me? Is there such a thing? If there is who are it's greatest (worst?) exponents? Uncomplicated humourists like James Corden and our mate Vegas make people laugh, so who am I to say that their wit is decidedly damp? Or that if it is that there is something wrong with that? They're the ones getting paid to be shit, after all. I'll be getting up for work again tomorrow morning and it is 11.41pm now. Laugh at that Orford.

Or do what you always do and just get a dry, witty way.

1 comment:

Dar said...

Irony can be beautiful Stevie. It has it's place, seemingly as much as Joss Stone and Gok Wan. Though God himself only knows why we seemingly elevate the scavengers of human misery like Wan. Can you seriously imagine that, erm, thing doing anything else with it's life other than being painfully rude. I've a soft spot for the self-deprecating Corden and Vegas types. After all, we can imagine ourselves perhaps even behaving in a similar fashion, given the opportunity. What I don't get is why the media choose the iconify common day morons like Jade Goody (not wishing to speak ill of those passed), and that ludicrous Katie Price. The real problem is the man in the street who consciously walks into the newsagents and buys the Daily Star, or this weeks copy of Chat. There's a saying - You'll never go broke appealing to the lowest common denominator... God it's true.. And it's a shame. So until our continually lowing social standards continue to scrape away at the bottom of the proverbial barrel, I'll chuck a yah, a boo and a hiss at all those placed on their societal pedestals and lob whatever leftovers from yesterdays cabbage based concoction I can hold in their direction. Keep writing.. Those who understand and relate will keep reading.